Across the sea, Barbara felt, a small and envious mind, a meanly ascetic mind, a creature of the conifers, was plotting the destruction of her home.
Evelyn Waugh, Put Out More Flags.
Yess! Exactly how I feel about conifers. The good people of St Leonards near here are up in arms because the Forestry Commission wants to cut down some trees to create a recreational space and hold rock concerts. Good! The fewer conifers there are about the better. Like Gertrude Jekyll, I love a Scots Pine. Conifer forests, though, give me the creeps. There’s a plantation just up the road. I’ve been there occasionally for walks and to pick up pretty fir cones but to me there’s always a hint of menace about. No birdsong; no other vegetation; I’m looking over my shoulder to see what’s out to get me. Give me the greenwood, every time.

BAD

GOOD
Evelyn Waugh, Put Out More Flags.
Yess! Exactly how I feel about conifers. The good people of St Leonards near here are up in arms because the Forestry Commission wants to cut down some trees to create a recreational space and hold rock concerts. Good! The fewer conifers there are about the better. Like Gertrude Jekyll, I love a Scots Pine. Conifer forests, though, give me the creeps. There’s a plantation just up the road. I’ve been there occasionally for walks and to pick up pretty fir cones but to me there’s always a hint of menace about. No birdsong; no other vegetation; I’m looking over my shoulder to see what’s out to get me. Give me the greenwood, every time.
BAD
GOOD