callmemadam: (Joni)
[personal profile] callmemadam
What a lot I am learning today.

1. Supermarkets are trying to kill you. This because they sell alcohol at discounted prices, thus increasing sales, consumption and deaths from over-drinking. Excuse me, but anyone who wants to drink themselves to death will do so anyway, so why shouldn't the rest of us take advantage of lower prices?

2. Drinking Coke will give you Alzheimer's. If you are a teeny weeny little mouse with a very fast metabolism and someone in a lab coat forces a lot of sugar down your pore little throat, you lose your memory. (How do you test a mouse's memory?) Ergo, according to these nitwits, fizzy drinks make human beans lose their memories, too. Huh? And by the way you'd have to imbibe at least five cans of fizz every day to get the effect.

3. The howling winds and lashing rain outside the window (or inside, in the case of my bedroom), are all my fault, according to these Canutes. Against climate change, are they? I'm against murder, rape, cruelty and any number of other things but I don't see what to do to prevent them. Better not open a climate change can of worms.

4. You shouldn't believe everything you read.

It's enough to make a person turn to drink.

Date: 2007-12-08 03:31 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] minniemoll.livejournal.com
So glad it's not just me. Especially on the booze.

Date: 2007-12-08 03:33 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] callmemadam.livejournal.com
You, me and the Wogan audience, I suspect.

Date: 2007-12-08 03:38 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] minniemoll.livejournal.com
I am a TOG before my time....

Date: 2007-12-08 03:55 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dozydormouse.livejournal.com
I'm afraid my theory is something has to get me and I'd rather the booze did before I end up crippled and confused like my Granny! If I end up the way she did I will resort to Gin and pills...

Although I have to say I was driven to drink last night but it didn't actually help. In fact I think it made it worse.

Date: 2007-12-08 04:29 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] callmemadam.livejournal.com
Sorry you felt that bad :-(
There's always the cup that cheers but does not inebriate.

Date: 2007-12-08 04:33 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dozydormouse.livejournal.com
If only I'd had choclate in stock it might have been OK...

Let's just say SiL did her usual line in subtle put downs my brother didn't notice but left me writhing. On the upside I am looking forward to drinking champagne and consuming all the lovely things she cannot very obviously in front of her.

Date: 2007-12-08 04:34 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] callmemadam.livejournal.com
Or telling her she mustn't!

Date: 2007-12-08 04:28 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] wardy.livejournal.com
I regularly used to buy Carlsberg from Tesco's at £2.95 for 4 or £12 for 24 cans when such offers were on and yet I drank no more a week than when the offer was not on and I paid full price.

I wonder how long it will be until someone tries to say that selling cars causes road accident...

Wardy

Date: 2007-12-08 04:32 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] callmemadam.livejournal.com
My point exactly.

I wonder how long it will be until...

You taking bets?

Date: 2007-12-08 06:30 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] wardy.livejournal.com
Yep! The odds are not good however!

Wardy

Date: 2007-12-13 06:15 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] gghost.livejournal.com
4. LOL. Absolutely.

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